<p>When I moved to California, I was utterly unprepared. What I thought I needed were the basics: driver's license, proof of residence, etc. It didn't take long for me to realize I was in for a wild ride. What I thought was simply a move to a new state felt much more like a detour into a foreign country. What I <em>should</em> have packed:</p><ul><li>Detective license&nbsp;</li><li>DNA test strips</li><li>Video camera</li><li>Tape recorder</li><li>Camera with professional zoom lens</li><li>Patience</li><li>Law degree</li><li>A Smith ' Wesson</li><li>A trail of gluten-free&nbsp;breadcrumbs to&nbsp;find my way back&nbsp;to my home state.</li></ul>