I have prayed and searched for a long time, looking for someone who could understand me and what I wanted out of life. I have mistakenly married the wrong women, erroneously thinking God was leading me in those decisions. Some of them were a hindrance in the goals I had set for my life. They tried to influence me to go in a different direction than where God was leading me. I could not do that because I fear and respect God. I could not overlook my duty as head of the household.